WASHINGTON — The campaign apparatus supporting TrumpleThinskin announced Tuesday that all remaining in-person rallies will be replaced by pre-recorded tele-rallies. A memo from the campaign’s new Bureau of Voter Contact Efficiency described live audiences as "a high-risk vector for unsolicited grocery-price questions." The memo set a goal of reducing all face-to-face voter contact to zero by November 4.
The decision followed a Fox News town hall in Fort Worth. Vice President J.D. Vance answered a college senior’s question about the cost of starting a family by noting he had been asked only one question about a man’s rear end. The question came from Jesse Watters.
The student, a self-identified TPUSA chapter vice president, did not receive a direct answer after a brief round of applause. Vance then told a story about an extraterrestrial named James Tallarico who moved to Texas and ran for Senate fifty years ago.
Campaign communications director Dina Stone said the new format preserves the energy of a live event while cutting costs. "For years, live events were the gold standard. But the data now show that tele-rallies can deliver the same energy with 40 percent fewer questions about eggs," Stone said. She added that the applause in the recordings had been sourced from a single 2019 event and would be reused indefinitely.
Stone said the campaign would still allow select pre-screened questions. A list of approved topics circulated to staff included American space superiority, foreign election interference by Venus, and the nutritional value of a $17 hamburger. The list did not include child care, rent, groceries, gas, or the phrase "cost of living."
The shift is notable because the former president spent two years ridiculing basement Zoom speeches. The campaign has not explained the difference between a basement Zoom speech and a tele-rally. This is the same campaign that once accused its opponent of hiding in a basement.
In a Monday exchange with reporters, the former president was asked about his health and travel schedule. "I think I'm doing good. I think you can see that," he said. He did not answer a follow-up about why the campaign had quietly scrapped rallies in three states.
Internal polling obtained by The Associated Press found 62 percent of likely Texas voters listed housing costs as a top concern. The same poll found 3 percent listed alien voter registration as a priority. The memo did not mention the first number.
Republican operatives have described Vance as a weak messenger who believes he is funny. Several candidates have avoided appearing beside him by citing schedule conflicts. One strategist said the preferred approach was to let Vance speak until he compared the cost of parenthood to a hamburger.
Vance has rejected the criticism. "I've been asked four or five questions by my count. I've only been asked one question about a man’s rear end, and it was by Jesse Watters," he said. He then added that the real problem was that no one was asking about the alien on the ballot.
The campaign did not respond to a request for comment on whether the tele-rallies would include a live voter. A subsequent email asked if the applause was pre-recorded. The automatic reply read: "Thank you for your support. Please enjoy this exclusive photo of J.D. Vance eating a $17 hamburger."
